Saturday, February 10, 2007

Taking it back

So, I did something wonderful last night. I unpacked the few boxes I had packed in anticipation of the life-changing event that never materialized. The few things I had packed were primarily books and DVDs, but having them tucked away in boxes that weren't going anywhere made me feel like my entire life was in transition...which it clearly was not. As I took these things out of the boxes, I felt like I was unearthing part of myself that I had buried away.

I am enjoying this season of rediscovering parts of myself that I feel I had...misplaced...over the last couple of months. Things that make me who I am, but that I was all too willing to minimize or attempt to obliterate completely, in the spirit of moving toward what I thought I wanted in life.

I am finding that I sit comfortably somewhere between hippie and beatnik, and that I love being in that place. I am never going to be comfortable with the bourgeois, and that is okay. I am more earthy than refined, more Dollar General than Macy's. I am never going to be the type to strive after creature comforts, orchestrating my life to assure that I will have those things. I am very much a "fly by the seat of your pants" kind of girl, and I am feeling wonderfully good about that these days.

In March, I am going to be taking a creative writing class...which I have time to do now that I am not doing paralegal studies. I've wanted to take a creative writing class for years, but never allowed myself the joy of doing it, because it wasn't "practical". I am at a place now where I think that being practical is, for me, boring, and I would much rather do what is in my heart to do. I love to write, more than just about anything else I could be doing. And it is to this end that I will invest my energies during this season of my life.

God is so good. Isn't it wonderful that no matter how far we may roam, as long as we are sincerely seeking His will, He always brings us back to where He meant for us to be?

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