Tuesday, July 17, 2007
Real Men, Part II
My wonderful friend "Black Heart" sent me this brilliant response to my blog. I loved it so much, I am posting it here. It's his work, not mine. No plagarism here...
Black Heart writes:
Ok, I can't resist. :-) Remember this is all in loving light.
"I referred to my ex as a "neanderthal", and for good reason. I have concluded that he is not a real man."
Actually, a Homo neanderthalensis (Neanderthal Man) is, genetically speaking, a different species of homo genus than that of the homo sapien rendition of a seemingly similar maturity level. So I think that what you would want to refer to him as "bottom of the barrel", "shame of the male gender", "the ruin of the good name of men who actually are worth a damn". When you begin speaking in terms of scientific terminology, I will pop my head up and put in my two cents, mainly because I wouldn't want you to put your foot in your own mouth. It's a very uncomfortable position. Unless of course you are able to do that and have a self admiring foot fetish thing.
anyway (diversions aside) leadership... any man can give orders and take responsibility for their orders. (just look at some of the leaders in our world) but it takes a real man to know when to listen to advice of a real woman and be able to make sound decisions based on all of the information that he is able to ascertain from a given circumstance. A real man must be able to do this without having to ask for the advice. He must be able to intuit what he needs to know to make proper the preparations for the survival of himself and his family at the same time. I say this the way that I did on purpose for the reason that if the man sacrifices himself to save his family then he did not think of all of the options available. My honest opinion.
A real man must be triumphant in all challenges and this includes knowing when to concede. Even in stepping down, he is triumphant provided that he does so learning what lessons he needs to learn from the situation. Much of what you say in this blog is heavily weighed toward the pain that was handed to you by previously mentioned homo sapien dredge of the masculine gender but in this blog, you have yet to describe what a "real man" is. I agree with much of what you say. A man should have his faith with God and not use it as tool for his own gains. That is, having faith that can be taken off outside the bedroom door which is not faith at all. Faith is that which motivates every cell and every neuron in one's body to exist. Faith knows no gender. Personally faith should never be used as a measuring stick because it is not our place in or on this earthly realm to judge another's faith in God. That is between that individual and God alone. (Don't worry, I am not pointing my finger at you...I have viewpoints that were pulled from the depths of my core based on some of the things that you said... in actuality, thank you very much for opening this door within me).
Onward. So... Demands... I think that a real man should know "When" to make demands...
"Bring me my Slippers" is a very bad time to make demands...
"The house is on fire, get out!" is a more appropriate time...
To state that a man should never make demands is binding him to ask for everything which nullifies the point that you made earlier about leadership. At least that's the way that I see the flow of the text.
Communication... well there's a big one. Men communication in one way and women communicate in a completely different style. So I would say that what men need to do is learn how women communicate. Now this is especially tricky because women's communication includes testing men to see if they know what the women are talking about. Real men are sharp of wit and have dexterity of intellect. Many Pseudo Men use big words, oftentimes, in an attempt to appear as though they know about that which they are talking. (hint to you men... If you didn't understand that sentence then you most likely have much to learn... don't give up)
Lastly... If you can't live your life as a happy single woman, how do you expect to attract a real man?
Light begins from within and it is there where you must begin the healing process. Defending against the ghost of previously mentioned homo ignoramous will only waste your energy and keep his hooks attached into your very sensitive spots which you, I am sure, have been protecting most egregiously. (yes I used the word egregiously)
While Black Heart is by NO MEANS asking me to defend my position here, I will say that the blog I wrote was written after a night without sleep of any kind to speak of, so it was rather choppy here and there, and did not do well in expressing my thoughts. He is right in saying that much of what I wrote is deeply attached to the pain handed to me by the aforementioned bottom of the barrel man I was dating a month or so ago, and may not accurately reflect my deepest convictions regarding what I look for in seeking a "real man".
Perhaps my tendency to attract men who are "the ruin of the good name of men who actually are worth a damn" is worth looking into...
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